So I am happy. Sure. I am, really. I am glad with the decisions I have made.
But there is that constant reminder that I gave up something good, something I could have kept doing forever… I miss canvassing. I miss community organizing. I miss Ohio and living with my friends. Now that I have spent a year doing the right thing I cannot go back. I have been exposed to too many wrongdoings in this country. I cannot shop at Target or Walmart for the sake of thrift.
Either way, I have to find a job now. And even though I have spent so much time talking to strangers and being PAID to be social, I find myself scared out of my pants of rejection. I know what to do; just go up to the counter, ask for a manager, ask for a job, give them a resume, call the next day. I know HOW to do this, but I can’t do this. I find myself frozen, thinking that there is no way will be accepted.
But don’t get me wrong. I am happy. There are simply a few things missing from my life right now that would make things a lot better, for me and for my writing.
October 08, 2010, 3:49pm Comments
